Okay, so I have a hard time not letting things bother me. I tend to take things very personally, and when one someone hurts my feelings or does something to offend me, I also want to say something back. Well this happened to me just now. I decided to write about it on here instead of say something back to the person who sent me something.
Last weekend we had a cord making party. We were originally going to go to one of the students parents cottage to makes cords, however, when first planning it, I was unaware at how far away the place way. It was about an hour. I was still game for the idea, and made a facebook event. I had several people reply saying they could not make it if it were that far away. Carpooling was going to be available. But the idea for a cord party is make as many cords as possible. We may not have gotten as many cords done if we had. I don't know for a fact, but considering we would have gone swimming and doing other fun activities, my guess is no one's goal would have been to make cords.
Any how...there were about 4 or 5 students who weren't able to make it if the party were so far away. Believe it or not, that can make a pretty big difference. Since no one else had any other suggestions besides the night before and day of, I changed the party to normal kids class times. Class was getting canceled on us anyone because they had a BJJ event going on so we couldn't train. A fellow Capoeiraista was just bitching at me for a good ten minutes when we got there. They were saying it was too had to make cords, and that new people had shown up and where were they going to train since the mats were being used. My first defense here should have been that they didn't even inform anyone that class would have been elsewhere so people would have shown up regardless. I tried to keep my mouth shut though, mainly because there were children there and I didn't want to make a seen.
We ended up making 12 cords totally. We labeled the ones that the students made which they would receive next week at the ceremony. Things settled down after an hour or so, people made about 1 or 2 cords then the mats opened up and people began to train again anyway.
I knew my colleague was pretty ticked off at me, but I had assumed things had blow over. I saw them a few times throughout the week, and they said a few things that I took as being snarky. I told Furao and just told me that is how that person is. So I went with it and never thought of it again until now.
I have a separate facebook page that I tried to keep for only capo stuff. (It hasn't worked out that great). I posted a message after the event to thank people for helping out and such. I even brought cookies and punch the following week as a thank (which I might add, since I have been training no one has ever done that. We usually tried doing a pot luck that never worked out). I checked my other facebook again today for the first time since then.
This is what I had in my inbox:
speaking of the cord thing. l was pretty pissed that you guys canceled on what could've been a fun party just cuz you didn't want to drive. everyone that showed up could've carpooled except you two and since we were there past 4 and still went to boba l suspect that you too would've had the time. and l could've still trained a real class, l get that you don't care to train that much but most of us still do. don't do that to me again.
I'm pretty upset by this message for multiple reasons. This is everything I want to say to this person but won't.
If they would have just listened to me when I tried to explain myself (or looked at the FB event page), they would have understood/seen that it was not because I didn't want to drive an hour away, yes I think it was a bit far but I still would have gone. They would have seen that the event was switched because it was an inconvenience to others as well. This person often talks about doing things as a group and more people should go to things. Well, sometimes it's hard for people to go places that are far way.They assumed that we couldn't carpool with others...I'm not even sure why they came to that conclusion to be honest because we never said we couldn't...and because we hung out until from about 1 pm tot 4:45 that day doing capo doesn't mean we had time. I'm not going to lie we left and had dinner with some friends and hung out and it was great. But spending time in town all day versus all day an hour is a huge difference. Travel time really kicks me in the tush sometimes.
Another thing that was irritating was the statement "I get that you don't care to train that much..." I don't think they understand why and when I train. Maybe they were an actual friend instead of criticizing me every time I didn't make it to class, maybe going to class would be fun again. It's also been really hard to get back into. I have more free time right now so it's easy to go, in a normal semester I don't have as much because my priorities are set on my school work and not capo. Just because my priorities are not the same anymore doesn't mean that I don't care/like to train.
I suppose this person won't have to worry about me doing this to them again. I just won't do crap for the group here anymore and we'll see how well things get done. I might not do a ton, but I do enough to make sure things get done, and done on time. If I do end up planning something else for capo, I'm not even going to discus it with others. I'm just going to pick a date, time and place and that's final. I will not take suggestions. Sometimes I guess you have to be a bitch to get things done.
Erg...this has helped a little. I just need to let time pass and let it blow over.
-Quebs
No comments:
Post a Comment